The Long Sleeve Lattice Dress // Original Post 2.23.16 BigBlondeHair.com
Shop My Look:
Shop My Makeup:
MAC Myth Lipstick / MAC Studio Fix Foundation in NW20 / Smash Photo Filter Powder in 4 / Ardell 113 Lashes / Lorac Pro Pallette in Nude / Makeup Forever Eyeshadow in Morello Cherry (my fave) / Diorshow Mascara / Mac Blush in Springsheen / Chanel Soleil de Tan Bronzer / Dior Eye Liner
Photos by @TekStiles // A big thank you to Brian and Marcin for letting us access their gorgeous roof top at Marina Towers in Chicago
Oh baby, today’s post is a big one! While I often do personal style posts like this one, I don’t really share much about my personal life. Long time readers know that I’m married to a finance guy, have 6 year old a son, live in the Chicago area, like to shop online and that’s about it. Over the past 6 years I have kept most pictures of my son, even though he is a little fashion stud, to myself for privacy reasons—which is a word that doesn’t even exist with the newer generation of bloggers. So today I’m going to start opening up the doors a bit because my husband and I are very excited to be pregnant with our second child, due August 2016! I’ve decided to share this pregnancy experience in hopes that I can help other women who may be pregnant and feeling alone like I did with my first pregnancy, or, from a fashion aspect, afraid they might end up in mom jeans. As you’ll see in this post, and all my posts, you’re definitely not destined to a future with any of that.
Long story very short, I got pregnant with my first son Mark when I was 27, recently married and living in Chicago. It might sound like normal age and cause for celebration, but when you are in your 20’s and pregnant while living in any major city, that’s pretty much like being “Teen Mom”. And, as someone who is pretty blunt about my feelings towards my life situations, when I wasn’t excited about it some people just couldn’t wrap their heads around it. “What? A woman who isn’t obsessed with having children and still loves having freedom in her late 20’s? So immature!” And although I did have some supportive friends and family members (who I will never forget) I felt that I had no one I could relate to with my specific feelings. What it came down to was the fact that I was extremely scared about such a life changing experience, and I didn’t know where to turn or how else to act and no one knew how to deal with me. It made for a crappy 10 (yeah, I know they told you 9) months.
But guess what? In true cliché fashion, my son ended up being one of the best things that ever happened to me and I wouldn’t change my experience ever. Thankfully being a mom came pretty easily—probably because my own mom is truly an amazing person—despite my fears and feelings towards kids I had dealt with previously; Interestingly,becoming a mom lead to me choosing to focus on Housewives fashion on the blog.
So what do the Housewives have to do with being a mom? Well, as I was pregnant and still being dragged out on the Chicago social—ie drinking—scene, I looked around and wondered how I’d ever walk into a bar or club again and “fit in”. And would I even be allowed to do those things anymore after Jr. popped out? I pretty much, ignorantly, thought that something about me would scream “mom” if I ever tried to go out with my girlfriends again. I really couldn’t for see my life ever getting back to “normal”.
But when my son was first born I happened to turn on an episode of the Real Housewives of Orange County, which I had never seen, and thought wow, these women have kids and they are still hot! They still have social lives, they don’t sit around all day and talk about their kids and they are in super great shape. I thought, some of them may be a little (a lot) crazy, but they don’t at all fit the image of “Mom” that I had in my head. And to this day, say what you will about them, but I still find them inspirational from the standpoint of not letting looking like a “Mom” define you,if you don’t want it to.
I’ll elaborate more as the weeks go on, but since I’ve had my son I’ve learned so much about how being a Mom isn’t about fitting into a mold, it’s about being who you are, even if not everyone agrees. Yeah, I’m that mom who goes out to a club in Vegas, takes maternity pics in tights dresses, and still feels more at home with her best friends—some with kids, quite a few without—talking about anything else but children, but it says nothing about me as a mom or my love for my son. What I do on my own time is my business, as long as it doesn’t effect my parenting in a major way. I’ve learned it’s all about balance, which took a bit. And I don’t think I know anyone who would say my husband and I haven’t done a good job raising Mark. The life we’ve made since we had him, how I’ve developed Big Blonde Hair and as a person has taken hard work, but I have more to be proud of than I ever did before. And although I definitelydon’t think more children equals more happiness (I’ll get to that in another post), I definitely think our experience with our first child couldn’t have been better for my husband and I. But sometimes it takes awhile to establish that rhythm in life, and rather than rushing and popping out another because of what other people said, we waited until a time that felt right—even if it was 6 years later.
So, I hope by sharing some of my experiences with in the mix of maternity fashion and beauty posts can help people to be themselves, and to be fabulous during pregnancy and after! And guess what? Even if you want to chill in sweatpants during pregnancy or as a mom and just read my stories, I’ve got no beef with that either. Just remember, you gotta do you and there’s nothing wrong with being different. After all, don’t you want to raise a child who isn’t afraid to be independent and do what they think is best with the tools you have given them?
Please feel free to comment on any post with any questions or comments about your own experiences. I’m looking forward to sharing everything (well, not any gross horror stories) with Big Blonde Baby #2!